I swam today!! Me! In the pool! Swimming! Yes, I know that’s a lot of exclamation points, but this was sort of a big deal. The last time I swam was just about a year ago, when I was in the midst of The Summer of Duathlon and decided that since I didn’t have to swim, I wasn’t going to swim. As you may know, I’m not a strong swimmer and I don’t particularly enjoy swimming, but I do it because…well, because triathletes swim. And I’m still a triathlete. So, in celebration of me getting my ass in the pool, here are Four Things (about my swim):
- I have special magical skills that can turn a ten minute swim into nearly 30 minutes. I’m a professional, so don’t try this at home, but here’s how I do it: Decide to swim, then tell UltraIronHubs that I’m going to swim. Check Facebook. Check email. Check Twitter. Check the stats for my business website. Check the weather. Sigh deeply and announce AGAIN that I am going to swim. Say, “Here I go. Swimming.” Walk slowly to the bedroom and remember that I had to throw out last year’s swimsuit because the chlorine ate it. Debate not swimming. Try on three of the 57 bikinis I own and for some unknown reason choose the one with the little bowties on the sides (which ended up looking like freaky hip knobs under the wetsuit). Take a moment to be grateful that any of my bikinis still fit. Look at myself in the mirror and wish for the one bajillionth time that I filled out the top a little more and the bottom a little less. Flex my muscles and make faces in the mirror. Hope UIH doesn’t come in and catch me doing this. Remember that I am going to swim, sigh deeply, and go into the closet to get the wetsuit. Struggle into the wetsuit (yes, I wore a wetsuit! There was no freakin’ way I was getting into the pool after a year off without some sort of flotation assistance!). Get the camera and take six selfies with varying expressions of “pool dismay.” Turn on the pool pump. Decide the water level looks a little low and grab the hose to fill it up. Water the garden. Check the zucchinis. Water the grass a little on my way back to the pool. Put one foot in the pool, then the other. Stand on the shallowest step and stare at the water. Sigh deeply. Step down to the next step and check the water temperature – mid-70s still, we’re having such a mild summer so far that the water hasn’t heated up. Put on goggles. Turn on SwimCounter. Finally decide that it’s now or never and sploosh into the water. Swim the FASTEST 400 meters I’ve ever swum, EVER (8 minutes and 14 seconds – fast for me, slow for everyone else on the planet), even including two stops to hang onto the side of the pool to catch my breath because I had forgotten how constricting a wetsuit is. Yes, apparently I’ve lost all my running and biking speed, but have somehow managed to hang on to my swim speed. Really? Selfie #2, wherein my expression shows concern but not outright fear of the water.
- In addition to my awesome swim, I biked and walked this morning. It was like my own teeny, tiny, super-slow triathlon! But in reverse. I started my morning with a two-ish mile walk with my mom and sister, then came home and hopped on Mr. Bike for a quick 8-mile ride (and by “quick,” of course, I mean “not quick at all”) and topped it all off with my 400 meter swim.
- By pure coincidence, these distances are exactly what I’ll be racing at my next triathlon! Yep, I decided to race a tri this summer and I’m both excited and terrified at this decision. I would much rather do a duathlon (“Oh, hello comfort zone! You’re so safe and easy! I want to stay here forever!”), but I know in the end I’ll be happier that I challenged myself. Uhhhh, but not too much, obviously, since I chose a Super Sprint.
- Hmmmmm, I guess I really only had three things to say about my swim, but here’s a picture of the zucchinis I harvested while procrastinating.
Nice giant zuchinnis! I’ll do almost everything to avoid actually swimming. 🙂
Hysterical post. Can’t wait to read more about your training. Lovely procrastination.
This is such a funny post, and I so identified with #1. The “getting ready to exercise” phase is always a large chunk of my actual exercise time. Procrastinators of the world unite…later!
I need to do some major catch up on your blog… I’ve missed you. For right now though, I’ll have to settle with just telling you great job on the swim. 🙂 Your new found speediness must be do to all those badass wall pushups and other hardcore strength training you’ve been doing. Awesome!
Also, procrastination makes life more fun… not everyone can do it so well. Keep up the great work. 😀
Hahahahaha!!!!! I love item #1! Totally sounds like something I would do!
I’m really impressed with those zuchinnis. The only thing that we seem to grow in our garden is mouldy dog poos. Your produce looks way more appetising.